Written by Coach Trevor James
If you’re thinking that I compare everything to exercise and training, you’d be right! This is because I am good at training and that’s what I know best so, for me, it helps make sense of things.
Everyone is different in this world for a reason, just like there are different phases of training for a reason. Some people are similar, while some categorize as either Type A or Type B personalities. There are leaders, followers, rockstars, superstars and so many more in between. I’m not here to teach you about personality types, rather to state that being different from one another is natural and it’s important to understand that that’s OK.
It starts with knowing who you are as a person. You really have no business telling others what to do, or even trying to help others, until you really know yourself. That comes in different forms and, unfortunately, cannot really be explained in any other way except you will know once you get there. I can, however, categorize some different types of personalities to help you decide (again, related to training): do you enjoy being yelled at during a hard workout? Or maybe you like softer encouragement better? Neither is right or wrong, but one person may get the opposite effect from one of these approaches than what was intended depending on their specific personality. This is a simple example to help show you that both ways of giving and receiving encouragement can work incredibly well for different people.
The next step is realizing that not everyone in this world thinks like you do. Referring back to my precious example, maybe I am a person that likes being cheered on, treated a little softer, and desires positive feedback. I can’t be afraid to own that need, and when the time comes, be able to instruct someone how best to coach me as an individual. This is where many of us struggle, and the differences between us often collide. There is only one way to make sure you can be the best person you can be: communication.
Many things in life have always come down to communication; with your partner, with your coach, with your team. What separates successful relationships from those that are not will always be communication. What makes a good team great? Communication. The next time you run into a problem with someone that you just cant seem to resolve, communicate that to them. Try to uncover all the different sides of the story and work from that perspective. The mind can be a terrible place to create situations in which you do not fully understand, but only if we let it.