Blog Posts

The art of communication

Posted 02.16.17 by

“The art of communication is every bit as much a science as that of the physical training of the body.” – Dan Pfaff
One thing i discuss with our athletes as we prepare for a sport is the ability to dial in every single concept and movement in the sport to treat it as a skill.  The littlest things that may seem trivial, or for that matter second nature, are still a honed skill mastered by those at the top.  When athletes are able to treat every single concept of a sport as a skill, and they practice that diligently then their ability to get into the zone will happen more readily.
With our coaches it is very similar.  I like to work with our coaches to understand the many different ways of communication as well as the importance of being compassionate, but sill knowing when to push.  Those are skills that need to be worked on for all individuals because there will be variance and biases based around age and gender.
However, another component for EVERYONE, whether you are an athlete, coach, husband, father, son, daughter, gym goer, etc. is the art of communication.  Communication is far more that habit, or talking, and the art of communication is the backbone to progress.
“To effectively communicate we must realize that we are all different in the way we perceive the world and use this understanding as a guide to our communication with others.”  –Tony Robbins
Here in lies the tough issue with communication; often times when things are miscommunicated or not understand we blame the other party and not ourselves.  To often people look to communicate based around THEIR experiences, THEIR ways of understanding, and THEIR methods of comprehension.  That is great for that person, however that is where lines get crossed or communication gets lost.
To be an effective communicator first takes the ability to be able to truly listen to the individuals.  You need to be able to intently listen and read the other person to see where they are coming from.  You need to be able to pull emotion from your message and talk with reason.  You need to be able to understand and “see” both sides and not just yours.  You need to be able to put yourself on the other side to understand their emotions and depth of purpose.  From there, you need to be able to pull ego out when contrasting points of view are delivered, and rationally go through the next steps.  Do not be so quick to talk, instead listen first, and then be clear in your delivery.
There are many other ways to be an effectively communicator.  The above is a quick list of ideas to consider.  One of the hardest aspects, I believe, is pulling any ego out of the talk, and being able to not take contrasting points personally.  That is the skill I constantly work on when communicating ideas to people.
The bottom line is, communication is a skill and an elegant art for that needs to be practiced and worked on.  The more effective of a communicator you are, the more progress you will have in ALL areas of life from work, marriage, parenting, gym goals, nutrition goals, implementation of ideas, etc.
Never assume that the message is lost due to the other person, instead take responsibility for not delivering it in  a way that pulled them in.  Talk with people and not to people.
Onward –
Coach Jay